Visions, color changes, and imperfection

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There’s a project I need to finish, but I can’t seem to get started with doing that. So I decided to read on it, in the hopes that this will turn out to be more productive than aimlessly hopping around on the internet…

I made up this spread just now, as a variation of many similar ones I saw over the years.

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1. The main ideaThree of Wands

I see an alien figure holding out a hand towards the silhouette of a sailing ship. It almost looks like a presentation of a projected image. Three orange beams of light mark three places in the wide open space-ocean surrounding the alien and ship.

Indeed, my project will be a presentation of something old(ish), and it will probably include the projection of images. I see myself as the alien here, reaching out and explaining, hoping for a connection. The results of my endeavour are not clear, it could be very rewarding, a total disaster, or something in between. All the water makes me think of the emotions tied to this project. I suggested doing it on an enthusiastic whim, it’s about something I care about, but I’m really not sure I can pull it off. I may just find myself out of my depth. Then again, I’m already an alien anyway, so how much more alienated can I feel if it goes wrong?

The golden-brown tones of the card feel warm and gentle, though, so I’m focusing on the hope for a good result here. Maybe the glowing stars are flashes of inspiration that pop up throughout the room as I do my thing? They also make me think of camera flashes, which reminds me of telling people not to take any pictures of me. I have no desire to be that famous. I prefer not to have my name and picture come up together on Google (and I just checked to make sure they still don’t).

Let’s see what the companion booklet says. It speaks about galaxy clusters that are surrounded by empty space. To me, that means a group of connected individuals sharing a common space, which sounds good for the event I’m having in mind. It goes on to say that galaxy clusters are so huge that we have a hard time even thinking their actual size. And then there’s this passage:

When this card appears, we need to broaden our vision. This is a time to think big. We must look beyond the limitations of what we believe to be the real world. The 3 of Wands challenges us to formulate a vision based on our biggest, truest dreams. This is the card of positive thinking; its message is that we can have our heart’s desire if only we are willing to expand our horizons in both time and space. — What vision is calling you?

Well, so much for my idea of a cozy, non-threatening, small event… It makes sense, though, to connect this project to a bigger idea of the life I’d like to have. I’m definitely taking a risk here, but it’s also a great opportunity to broaden my horizon (I never did something like it before, let alone on my own).

So I suppose I need to find me a couple of guiding posts for the first few steps into the new territory. Have an idea of how I’ll begin. Feel my way forward, step by step. And remember who my quasi-patron saint for this adventure is — and that she’s actually the perfect example of thinking big. Makes sense!

2. DoEight of Swords

Here I see a ladder of swords. In the background are some colorful balls and a woman’s face, whose eyes and mouth are covered by two of the horizontal swords.

I take that to mean I need to put on my big-girl boots and just do the work I’m trying to avoid. Thinking, structuring, getting done with it. Who says these swords even have sharp edges? They could just be harmless props! So it’s also a message to not be petrified by my fears of failure.

The companion booklet teaches me new things:

Colour is a convention describing the way that quarks are held together with the strong force […]. The attraction between colour-charged quarks is very powerful but only works over tiny distances. When two quarks interact, they exchange gluons (strong force carrier particles […]), which creates a force field that binds the quarks together. The quarks constantly change their colour as they exchange gluons with other quarks. The further apart the quarks are, the stronger the force field becomes. […] Gluons carry both a colour and an anti-colour and so are colour-neutral.

The attraction only works over tiny distances but the force field becomes stronger the further apart the quarks are? Seems as if I’m supposed to look into paradoxes here…I really enjoy the idea of color as a non-dual force. Makes me think of my concept of gender and how we constantly change “color” (sometimes subtly, sometimes radically) depending on who we interact with.

The booklet goes on to say:

…you have become imprisoned by your own limited perceptions. […] — How can you release yourself?

I suppose I can just shapeshift into who I need to be for this event. I’ve done it before. Never mind the tiny space, it’s all about interaction. Good reminder!

3. Don’tWorld

This is a World card I don’t much like due to the high kitsch factor of the double rainbow and the modern dance pose of the person in/on the globe. In this context, I take it to mean that I shouldn’t strive for harmony above all.

Interestingly, the colors and stars (galaxies?) from the first card are repeated here, as if they’ve spilled over. So I may be reaching out, but I need to adjust my expectations. This event won’t be the end-all, be-all of things. There’s always more.

The booklet titles this card “A Theory of Everything (TOE)” and that’s enough for me to know what it means. I’m not supposed to try and make everything about my project fit perfectly, to achieve flawless harmony, to eliminate all contradictions and rough spots. On the contrary. It will be better if it isn’t perfect. Because that will make it easier to relate to. (I hope.)

And now I’ll go and do some of the work I just clarified.

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