Tag Archives: bling

Bling the International Icon!

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I mostly had a Four of Cups kind of day today (thanks, hormones…), so when I came home tonight, I felt like playing. What better way to do that than blinging a few more cards?!

When I looked through the International Icon Tarot, the weirdly emphasized scepter of the Empress stood out to me. Suddenly it looked like a microphone, and that’s where it all started… Now I had to find someone for whom she would hold the mic, and then there was that guitar, which seemed even better, because you can’t have the Empress just sit there and serve someone else, right? As you can see, there isn’t much left of the original microphone idea by now, but that’s probably for the best.

The interpretation of this blingified version? Classic Empress, of course: This card is all about femininity, boundless creativity, female power, a bit of chaos and overabundance, and generally ruling the masses.

Imagine it is 1992 and she is the all-female rock band L7 (except I believe L7 would never have tolerated a disco ball) at an outdoor music festival I went to with my best friend (back when people always thought we were a couple but we never were). This was the first time ever I saw a bunch of women rock a crowd like that – needless to say I was massively impressed and went on to get all their records on tape. Fast and Frightening still is one of my all-time favorite songs. Here’s the official video (to get an impression of how they were on stage check out this video from 1990).

After that, I looked for another card to bling, and since I had discovered the wig section of Blingee.com, I decided to put some strange wigs onto some card characters.

What can I say? There were mostly wigs with long, feminine hair, and then I thought of how we always complain that the Lovers and Two of Cups are so heterosexual all the time, and then it all turned into a lesbian version of paper dolls…

I would have preferred to make a nice butch and femme couple (since that’s how I rock), but there weren’t any useful pants, the short hair wigs didn’t fit the three-quarter position of the head, and it probably wouldn’t have looked the way it feels anyway.

So I settled for these two. Thank goodness someone started associating rainbow colors with gayness a long time ago, because that made it all so much more kitschy so much more easily! I’m especially delighted with the image of Applejack and Twilight Sparkle from My Little Pony – Friendship is Magic I came across right at the end – a butchy outdoor pony and a nerdy femme one make the perfect subtext to this otherwise rather mainstreamy image of lesbian love. More so since the character on the left had that braided wig and hat combo, and the one on the right was clad in pink things already.

Serendipity works in the strangest ways!

And my mood has improved, too.

Bling the Thoth!

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Prompted by a current thread on AT I created another blinged card, this time of the Thoth Tower. Instead of adding a lot of crazy colors and images to it, I decided to just animate the scene for an even greater intensity. You do have to agree that the original image seems somewhat dull in comparison… →

I will now offer the interpretation for this vastly improved and enhanced version of the card.

As you may know, many people consider the Tower a scary card with a message of sudden doom and destruction (if you’re a turkey, that probably still applies…). But let’s focus on the two kitties here because they make all the difference and bring to light some aspects of the Tower card that are often overlooked.

Witch kitty (the one who leans so nonchalantly on the cozily warm fire-spitting pipe with teeth) remains calm within the chaos because she knows there will be roasted turkey for dinner today. That teaches us that one person’s disaster is another one’s delight. So this card could tell you to call the landlord about that nice apartment next door now that the grumpy old man who used to live there has left it feet-first. Or to ask your rich cousin for a good price on her motorcycle now that she can’t ride it anymore due to the loss of her left foot. Or maybe it just means you beat the competition and win that haunted tarot deck on eBay.

Dancing kitty (whom you may already know from the blinged Deviant Moon Hermit) is safe in her field of inflammable pink glitter flowers. That teaches us about how we are not at all affected by most of the catastrophes going on around us. We remain safely ignorant of most wars, floods, droughts, famines, car accidents, plane crashes, train wrecks, terminal cancer diagnoses, positive HIV tests, and stillbirths that take place all over the globe. And that’s a good thing.  Because none of us would actually be able to stand dealing with that much disaster and destruction. We need to turn our backs on a lot of horrible things so we can keep on living and stay sane. Therefore, escapism into the field of glitter flowers isn’t always a bad thing. Everyone needs a break from the bad news at some point. This will be harder if you are a turkey and not a kitten, of course. But after Thanksgiving and Christmas are over and the next summer holidays come along, the kittens may be the ones in trouble (because people suddenly realize that kitty can’t come on the holiday, or that the cute kitten they got for Christmas has turned into a disobedient teenage tomcat). So don’t fool yourself into thinking that you’re safe forever if only you pad your world with enough romance novels, computer games, or pastel-colored angel oracle cards.

Finally, there’s the new slogan “Happy Fall” which reminds us that what seems like a catastrophe today will often look like a blessing tomorrow. It tells us to look for the parts of the unwanted, sudden change that we might even be able to enjoy while the disaster is still going on. Maybe it’s feeling completely awake in a sudden crisis, or an ability to keep a clear head when every other turkey flaps their wings in panic, or finding support/companionship where you didn’t expect it, or the opportunity to try out different roles or aspects of your personality, or a knack for black humor that offers some tension relief for everyone, or… Not to mention the unexpected positive consequences of a change you didn’t choose yourself. Maybe you never would have met this or that wonderful person if things had gone differently. Maybe you never would have discovered this new talent for finding exactly the help you need or for getting things done on your very own for the first time, or maybe you just wouldn’t know how stubbornly you can keep going.

I hope I’ve been able to demonstrate how the blingified version makes it much easier to see these aspects of the Tower card.

P.S. One final interpretation for this card: If your eyes itch and burn, and your eyeballs feel as if they’re about to pop out of your head, it may be because you got some glue from your fake eyelashes into your eye.

Bling the Deviant Moon!

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It’s all Laura Borealis’ fault. Look what she’s done to the Thoth.

When I saw that, I couldn’t resist. I don’t think I’ve quite achieved her genius, but I still bring you:

The Hermit. With Bling!

Of course I can also explain the meaning of this card, post-blingification.

See, sometimes there’s just too much love, too much glitter, and one too many dancing kitten. That’s when you want to hide away in a dark, smelly corner, scream a little to yourself, and get out one of your dark tarot decks to do some deep, dark, depressed divination.

And then you realize there’s no escape. The rainbow mirror ball shines into your darkest hiding spot, love creeps up in the most uninviting places where dead fish burp pink hearts at you, and even your own skin betrays you. In short: The dancing kitten always finds you.

Is it any surprise you’re mad?

———

You will understand now why I call this the “light” side of this card. It’s also called the “upright” meaning. Not all readers use light/upright meanings and prefer to stick with the traditional dark interpretations and read all of their cards reversed. But I’m convinced that all cards carry a range of meanings from dark to light, and that we as readers should embrace all of them, from smelly, dead fish to purring kittens, to give our readings more flesh (yes, I know, some of you prefer to stick with the bare bones, but even you need some sinew to hold everything together).

In fact, there are a number of so-called “fluffy bunny” decks out there that are made just for that purpose: to increase awareness of the “light” sides of the cards. I recommend you give one of them a try! (Note: You can always wear sunglasses if all the light becomes too much for you, or run a soundtrack of gothic metal to balance things out a bit.)

Or even better: Blingify your own deck! Vampires and other melancholy creatures can gain so much from a little bit of glitter!